11:03 PM Oh my gosh! This is great! I got into Fildesign!

10:13 PM You know what's sad? I don't really care about what's happening at EDSA right now. "Out of sight, out of mind", I used to say of the Filipino psyche--and now I realize that's how I am, too.

On to another topic, but no less depressing; terrible things happened to me today. Four times today, my actions and/or words were misinterpreted by someone. I mean, it was totally irritating how I was blamed for things other people did. It's just that I was the last one there, so the blame was laid on me.

Sometimes I feel so unwanted; I mean, they have her, who is the perfect embodiment of, um, everything, so why the hell am I needed? I'm just not the time that everyone likes. What is it? I'm no bitch. I'm no brat. I just say what I mean and I go my own business. Okay, so maybe I have a short temper and a sharp tongue, but I swear I didn't use that on these people today--so why are they so pissed at me?

One thing's for certain: I have a lousy sense of timing.

Anyway, I'm going off for a short Labor Day-occasioned vacation tomorrow, with my family. Don't worry, my beloved readers (hee-hee), I'm not leaving the country; I just won't be able to update until Tuesday. And I'm going to miss the last episode of Survivor: the Australian Outback. Great.

09:22 AM The situation doesn't seem to have gotten any better. I'd like to share an article I read in the Philippine Star yesterday, by Federico D. Pascual, Jr.:

"...It may not be fair to him, but many people see Erap's strenuous effort to stall his arrest and trial as a sign of guilt. He looks terribly scared to face the truth...

Why is Erap trying so hard, hiding behind technicalities? It may just be his lawyers speaking for him, but the fact is that they don't seem to have trust in their case as well; thus, in order to do the job they are being paid for handsomely, Erap's lawyers must resort to all kinds of technicalities and hedging--motions and mounds of paperwork delaying the procedure.

"...When people who had missed the radio-TV coverage of yesterday's developments... ask us about the case, these are the first two questions they invariably blurt out:

• Have they arrested him yet?
• Will his cell be air-conditioned?

"While common among the rich and a segment of the middle class, air-conditioning is a luxury denied most Filipinos. Extending this to a person accused of plunder, or the systematic massive looting of public money, may not sit well with them."

It may not sit well with some people, but the sentiment among pro-Erap people is that we should be kind to him because he was once president. To this, however, Mr. Pascual has a rebuttal.

"On the contrary, since Erap committed the alleged heinous crime of plunder while he was President, his holding the exalted position at the time and his having taken a sacred oath of office should be considered aggravating, not mitigating circumstances."

On another note...

"As of late yesterday, Erap stragglers had encamped around the EDSA shrine at the intersection of Ortigas Ave. in a sacrilegious parody of EDSA People Power.

"But they do pose a legitimate question: if it was right for a mass of like-minded citizens to gather at EDSA and cause the removal of two presidents, would it be less right for a similar crowd, albeit smaller in number, to gather at the same shrine to air an urgent political grievance?

"Who is the arbiter of what is right and not right when People Power is invoked? It would be interesting to hear from the people themselves.

The way I see it, this show of numbers is not a parallel of the other People Power demonstrations because PP1 and PP2 had a moral issue behind them--both to remove someone who had abused their power and had taken part in corruption. Both PP1 and PP2 aimed to remove the top source of corruption--and as they say about presidency anywhere in the world, "the buck stops here". This "parody of EDSA People Power" does not want to remove the corrupt, but aims to restore the bad element that is Erap--and in that it aims to restore what he actually stood for--graft, corruption, and cronyism. Also, PP1 and PP2 were very peaceful events (don't believe what you've seen on CNN; that little spat between pro- and anti- was the exception to the rule, not the embodiment of the whole demonstration); the current demonstration at EDSA is charged with aggression, harrassing motorists and pedestrians alike if they seem to be against Erap; the crowd of Erap loyalists in front of his house in Greenhills had stones and threw them at the police.

No one is calling this People Power 3, except the Erap supporters. Aside from the aforementioned reason, though, another reason pops into my mind. It really seems to me that the media has a large hand in naming demonstrations and providing media exposure to them. The media were the first to label the demonstrations as People Power and People Power 2, treating them as major events. However, at the present pro-Erap demonstration, when members of the media were attacked by the Erap supporters, it seems to have put the media off covering it. We still read about it, and we watch it on the news, but there is no 24/7 coverage like there was with PP2 just last January. Right now the perception I have of that demonstration going on at EDSA is that it's a small group of people, ballooned because of the amount of money being pumped into their hands; aside from the Erap diehards, they're being paid to stay at the demonstrations.

11:15 AM I thought it was over. When I went to EDSA in that January week this year, I thought we'd finally kicked out one of the worst, most idiotic, and most corrupt presidents in Philippine history.

But no! There's still a battle to be waged, not only in the courts, but again on the streets. pro-Erap people are being called to EDSA to call for the resignation of President Arroyo and also for the return of Erap to power--a strange reversal because that's the place where anti-Erap rallyists like myself had gathered in order to oust Erap, and the place where President Arroyo was sworn into office.

I don't want to watch the news. I feel sick and enraged because I thought we'd gotten rid of one of the tumors of society; however, it's just metastasized, turning the whole thing into a class struggle--Erap for the poor masses versus Arroyo for the elitist few--when it's not and shouldn't be.

The thing is, these people support Erap largely because they can't make a distinction between his movie personality (Asiong Salonga, the Robin Hood of the Filipino people) from who he really is. They've blinded themselves to the fact that he really hasn't done anything good for them; in fact, the economy underwent a massive downturn during his two years in power. In only two years, he has done a lot of damage to the quality of life Filipinos lead. Think about it: economic downturn + increased and open corruption in the civil service... But I'm not just talking economics here; everything else he did in office was a maneuver not to unite the sectors of society (which is what a good president would do to ensure harmony and peace), but to sow discord among them so he could play peacemaker and godfather--in effect, to increase reliance on him as the savior of all.

I can't stand back and do nothing. But what can I do? I can't even vote in the May elections.

09:22 AM The party last night was great! Julia looked really beautiful in her gown, and the whole event was constructed so that people still felt like an intimate part of the family-and-friends thing even though it was really formal. Not to mention, it was truly touching to see so many people who care about Julia all in one room.

The reason I said it was a star-studded event is because Julia belongs to the family into which several big Filipino celebrities have married. Her uncle is a senatorial candidate (People Power Coalition) for the May elections, and one of her newest aunts, who is married to the aforementioned uncle, hosts a show on ABS-CBN. Another of her uncles, who is married to her mom's sister, is someone who's been called "Mr. Pure Energy". Now do you know which family I'm referring to? She's related to them on her mother's side.

Reading the above paragraph makes me think I must read like a person who befriended Julia just because of her famous relatives, which is certainly not the case. I only found out about them when I started connecting the dots in our first, or maybe second, year of school together, and she doesn't boast about them. Last night, though, I felt all the more special because I was important enough to invite to her debut.

Now, if only I could have asked for her singer uncle's autograph... Drat it.

12:53 PM I feel so frazzled right now. Right and left, I'm being bombarded with questions and answers and requests for me to do this and that... Argh.

My dad is having his phone repaired, so right now I'm acting as a carrier of messages from my sister to him. She's out of the house and depending on my dad for transport, but the problem is they don't have a clear understanding of where they're supposed to meet. I've spent a lot of my lunch hour just shuttling their messages to and fro (from my sister's text messages to my dad's beeper) that I wasn't even able to appreciate my meal.

In addition, David wants me to create a website for our group of cousins, which is okay because I love making websites. However, David, if you're reading this... My net connection is very slow, so I can't get to the files immediately like you do with your cable modem. Please just wait for me to text you when I've gotten them, okay?

09:47 AM Happy 18th birthday, Julia! May God bless you and give you more birthdays to come!

There was a scheduled blackout last night from 11:30 PM to 5:30 AM ... and I slept through it all! Hehehe. But when I woke up, my whole family had left--Mama to go to work, Papa to go to work, and my younger sister to fix some stuff for her entrance into college this coming year. I'm all alone, not to mention the sky is now overcast, and it looks like the whole neighborhood isn't aware that the electricity is back on.

Ooh, weblog, you're my only companion!

06:39 PM I didn't know much about pesto before, but when my aunt brought it to our house last Sunday, an incredible thing happened. Now I want to put pesto on everything! It doesn't help that my mom got us about a month's supply of pesto and it's just sitting pretty in our refrigerator. What's worse, I'm trying to shed some retained water so I'll look a little more sleek in my gown for tomorrow evening. The problem is, I've been eating pesto with soda crackers, and that makes me drink water like a camel! *sigh*

I read up about weblogs--the basic stuff: history, what people say about them, prospects on their future usefulness. I got to thinking that this weblog I'm writing is actually somewhat private. I'm sharing information about me that I wouldn't normally tell a person I'd just met in real life--and here that information is on the World Wide Web! I do wonder if people have been stalked through the info they provide in their weblogs. I can only pray I've been careful enough with the information I've given out... but I think I've said too much already. :p Paranoia here I come.

If you haven't gone to the "Linkage" section, I have a little button there for people who want an image link to Adolescence Rush. Plus I've added a few more links. *hops around* If you're reading this and you have a personal site, send me your URL! I love looking at personal sites! So email me or [shameless plug starts here] sign my guestbook... and in the process, tell me what you think about my site as well. [shameless plug ends here]

09:28 AM Tomorrow, I'm going to my friend Julia A.'s 18th birthday party (yes, that in/famous thing called a debut), and it's a formal event. But for formal events one must wear formal clothes, so last night I rummaged through my clothes looking for that gown I wore to another friend's debut (thankfully, the two debutantes don't know each other, so I can use the gown again).

I'd already dumped all my clothes on the floor, and it was such a huge pile of clothes that I began to wonder how I'd get them back into my closet. I still hadn't found my gown, though.

Suddenly my sister starts laughing hysterically in the other room. I was going, "What? What?", and then she comes into my room holding my gown. The situation was just so comical--me on the floor buried under a pile of clothes while she had the gown I'd been looking for all this time.

I hope I don't embarrass myself at the party. Several celebrities are going to be there. *wink*

09:08 PM I finished part of the "Gallery" section (you can access it by clicking on the link in the menu), specifically the first three sections. I have yet to create any edited pictures of anything, so that section's still blank. Anyway, I'm really excited about Adolescence Rush. So excited I completely forgot about my other weblog, which I'm also moving to my space here on F2s.com. Goodbye, Pitas.com. It's been fun and the service was great.

05:29 PM Gomakross.org's color scheme also runs along the lines of Adolescence Rush's orange. I have a feeling I'm going to have to change my layout soon. I don't want to look like other sites! Mmm... but I'm already attached to this layout! So it stays. :D

Speaking of websites, I've placed a few pictures of myself and my family in the "Vital Stats" section. Also, I've begun my "Gallery" section, which will contain my semi-artistic doodles and experiments in Photoshop. Tee-hee. At least this site will have more content than just the weblog.

And speaking of weblogs, I decided to abandon the Pitas log and just write the log by myself. I find it takes a lot less time to write my entries offline and then upload them to the server than to log into Pitas and write my entry there--and when you're on prepaid internet like I am, time does matter.

Besides, now I'll have complete control over the content. :D

10:04 PM I was browsing the other Flipblogs just a while ago... and the color scheme for Adolescence Rush looks suspiciously like [drum roll please] KReMe blog! Yikes! I'd never seen KReMe blog before that, I swear. Maybe it's the fact that I got the orange from Photoshop's color palette, and KReMe blog also uses the same image editing program. Ah, heck... I'm feeling so insecure. :p

Anyway, I used to run fansites. Actually, two fansites. I still run my Corrs fansite, but it's only been recently that I've realized it was also very rewarding to run a personal website. I used to think "Well, who'd want to know about me?" However, the popularity of weblogs is a big indicator of just how obsessive people are with knowing about the lives of other people. I'd like to call it the next-door-neighbor syndrome. Hehe. Or maybe in Filipino, the "ober-da-bakod" syndrome, where people talk to each other over their fences, gossiping about the lives of people in the neighborhood. How cute!

10:46 AM I tried reading a blog written in Filipino, and found, to my surprise, that my Filipino writing and reading abilities are in a sore state of disrepair and disuse.

Of course, being in UP, I use Filipino as a spoken language (if you used English outside the classroom as your usual language, people would think you were being high and mighty--coñotic, as they say). But all my papers and exams have been conducted in English.

Even the arrangement of the keys on QWERTY keyboards isn't conducive to writing in Filipino.

Still on the subject of language, I studied Spanish for about three semesters, but it's so rusty I don't even trust myself to write a sentence. Such a waste.

06:12 PM I would like to plug my cousin David's site, Marit Larsen Online. I've been helping him work out the kinks in his server, and his site now totally rocks! Er, sings? "Mirror mirror hanging on the wall..."

I think I didn't have this blog then, but he, I, and my other cousin JJ went to see an M2M concert once. I even have pics to prove it (and I'll scan them someday, yeah). David and I are engaged in a perpetual debate over who is prettier--Marit or Marion. :P

02:24 PM I wonder why so many people out there on the net claim to be insane, pretend to be insane, etc.? Is there a coolness factor in being insane? If ever I claim to be insane, these might be my reasons.

1. People might think I'm more interesting because I'm unpredictable and lots of things happen in my life. Otherwise, they might just think I'm creepy, and they won't browse my site anymore.
2. I'll be able to scare off all the unsavory characters. On the other hand, I might attract genuinely insane people to me. Er...
3. I can claim immunity from any legal action stemming from whatever I do on the internet. However, I'm going to have to prove my claim in front of a shrink. Oops.
4. I might be the real thing. Crazy. Loco. Loka-loka. Now, wouldn't that be interesting?

The thing is, I'm not. I may have my quirks and may act a little kooky, but nobody's ever told me I'm crazy. My parents, who are doctors, say I'm normal, aside from my tendency to get a little obsessive over my interests.

During full moons, however, I turn into a she-wolf and disappear into the night to feed on unsuspecting victims. AHAHAHAHAHA!

Yeah right.

01:34 PM This feels different, certainly. Not only the interface has changed, but my whole outlook on blogging here, too. I feel like I'm now writing here with a purpose, and it just feels so nice not to have a site name that's my name. It was simply too boring. Ah well.

I think I'm ready to post that pic of myself now. I just need to resize it and blur my face out. Hehe.